My vision for This Rainbow Life started as a desire to find others who wanted to connect through LGBT literature. It’s been about one year since the inception of This Rainbow Life and Rainbow Readers Book Club.
Since I started these communities, I’ve realized that I gravitate towards activism against identity abuse in its many forms.
As I’ve worked over the past few years penning several novels, but never publishing, I looked back and analyzed why I haven’t moved forward with publishing these works.
It was always under the pretense of surface excuses; my story isn’t quite right, it’s missing something, I don’t have the money for production and marketing, and so on…
I’ve since realized I was afraid. Afraid to confront my demons.
To fully acknowledge how bad the abuse really was in my life. Dear Readers of my little Book Club, having interacted with you over this past year has given me courage and bolstered my spirit.
I suppose because I worked so hard for years, to conceal the depression and anxiety, born from chronic identity insecurities, I came to believe the lie, I was alone.
The wonderful members in this group have helped me to see, through their own personal stories or bringing wonderful fictional stories to my attention, I am not alone.
I have finally decided to move forward with my debut novel Ayame. It’s a fictional LGBT magical realism story based very closely on the experiences of identity abuse I suffered, living as a Mormon for 32 years.
I was so unhappy I almost took my own life, and never once considered that “God,” or more appropriately religion, was the cause of my depression.
Thank you to my community, even though you don’t know it, you’ve given me the courage to finally move forward. I’ve come to realize how much sharing my story might just help others, as others’ stories have helped me so very much.
A Brief Book Blurb:
After Ayame gets an impulsive tattoo she begins to have strange dreams about the tattoo artist. Before she knows it she’s fallen in love with this woman through her nightly dreams. Ayame will be faced with choosing between her devotion to a God she trusts and loves, or her soul mate who makes her more happy than she’s ever been. The most distressing realization is that she can’t have both.